Are You There God? It's Me Pamela

I wanted to end this year like I will began this year by speaking with You. We are 365 days into this year and the earth about to start yet another rotation around the sun. 2007 is 11 hours away and I thank Thee for, as of this moment, allowing me to see it.

I joked this year that you got to the "P's" but in actuality it's just that I just finally caught up and fell into step beside you. You've always kept me close, because even I can admit - I can be one naive woman, but my entire life You have allowed me to drift and float and not be anymore than singed by the sins of the world and the deviousness of people. I always had just enough rope to live but never enough to hang myself and I feel doubly blessed that I never asked for that either.

This is the year that I became comfortable with me and the path I was on.

This is the year that I believed that you heard me regardless of whether or not I proclaim the way some want me to or speak to you within the confines of a group.

This is the year that I learned that though the glow of happiness may illuminate me - it burns like acid the skin of others.

This is the year that I became ready for love and at that moment it was presented to me.

This is the year that I became important to me and despite labels and such - I put on a one woman show all about....me.

This is the year that I got off a couple of hamsters wheel, because I had exercised my thoughts enough to finally believe them myself - therefore the constant force feeding of other ideas is no longer necessary. At some point you purge more than binge.

This is the year that I fell totally completely and unabashly in love with...me.

This is the year that the lines on my face are more about laughter and joy than pain and sorrow.

This is the year that I am humbled by my faults ALL of them.

This is the year that has revealed all that needs to be done next year.

I just want to thank you Allah, who came in the person of Master Fard Muhammad, for making my rotation around the sun possible, and keeping my face towards the sun and towards....you.

I am not going to make any resolutions except that I resolve to LIVE and not conduct myself in ways that will faciliate my DEATH. I resolve to look outward at the big picture and not at the road that leads to me all the time because I am NOT the best knower or the only planner of my journey. I resolve to continue to take steps forward and in the event I get stagnate allow others to give me a push - the people who are true stewards of my life mean me only the best.

As this year comes to an end I bow my head in Prayer to you...

In the name of Allah, the beneficient, the most merciful, master of this day and judgement in which we all live. Thee alone do we serve and Thee alone do we beseech thy aid.

Oh Allah, guide us along the right path. The path of those upon whom Thou has bestowed favors, not the path of those who have gone astray after hearing they teaching...

Say He Allah is one God. Allah is He of whom nothing is independent but upon whom we all depend. He neither begets nor is He begotten and there is None Like Him. And I bear witness that none deserves to be served or worshipped besides Thee. And I bear witness that The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad is His Last and Greatest Apostle.

AMEN!

Labels: Year End