Odd Relationships

ATLNEWBIAN sparked an additional thread, lol thanks! Before I begin, however, I wanted to just say what you already know - these, unless otherwise indicated are my opinions and they may or may not be skewed when bumped up against yours :) I really don't have any concrete answers - just experience like everyone else. So, if this series turns you off or anything - sorry.

So anyhoo - I want to talk about some of the 'odder' dating situations I have found myself in.

The Phone Relationship

Due to the internet, we now have the ability to meet folks that don't live in our immediate area. These relationships can be harmless enough and alot of people don't even count them as valid, but they can be. I remember (and you can get ready to laugh) I 'dated' a Brother for almost a YEAR and never once laid eyes on him in person! Yep! And we both considered ourselves to be dating. I met him while I was 'teaching' at PCDI. He called to see about one of his Juvie's (he was a cop). We struck up this conversation because he had the sexist voice ALIVE! Lawd have mercy! He started calling and asking to speak to me and eventually, I broke protocol and gave him my home phone number. We took it from there. I'll say up front, it takes a interesting personality and a bit of a deviant to maintain this kinda thing, lol Ultimately you do have a social deficiency of some sort, lol We would 'date' by say going to applebee's and then calling each other and actually dating. We did alot of things together like that. We had an intimate relationship as well - I think we invented the 'phone bone' LOL LOL LOL He was a musician and would go on gigs and set his cell phone up and I would listen to him play, lol lol There were cards and little gifts and all kinds of things. Eventually, I met someone in person and my attention started to be distracted from phone time and we broke up. I remember it was very emotional. I think that I was able to do that because (1) I was at a period in my life where I didn't want the face to face interaction but wanted the communication with a man and (2) I had withdrawn into my own world and this didn't impose on that.

The Long Distance Relationship

As you all know, Mobetta and I were a long distance couple. We met on the net and it spiraled from there. This relationship can be expensive especially if you live longer than a short car ride away. In all honesty, I would never start a relationship that was long distance. If we were together and it became long distance okay. What I learned about the long distance thing is that I personally am a vulnerable person and whereas I thought that I didn't need in person one on one attention - I did. Nobody wanted to move or give up their lives - which ultimately means - you dont' want to be together. The phone relationship was actually easier because you hadn't tasted the fruit only to then be denied. Long Distance is one long honeymoon. It begins and ends with the persons arrival and departure. However, what I have learned is that the relationship is the stuff that's in between that. I used to pride myself on being able to withstand all kinds of uniqueness in a relationship. Well once I stopped defining myself by others - I discovered that, I needed touch, smiles, interaction even if it were during a fight. In Long distance, sometimes you table all of that because it's about TIME and TIME is precious.

The Internet Relationship

I've never been involved in a total internet relationship, in terms of calling myself 'dating' someone who I only speak to on the internet. Well I've been in an abridged version of this with Mobetta, but that's about all. This relationship is kinda deep because it involves a whole heap of your time and the capacity to be quick witted as hell with your writing skills. I think I would get bored with this type of thing.